One day I approached someone from behind, and before I could utter one word, they called my name. “How did you know it was me?”, I asked. Her response, “I heard you coming.” Now, I am not one of those women who stomps around like a rhino doing the buffalo dance. And I was 100% certain that this individual wasn’t tuned in to the gracious sway of my signature walk. So I continued, “what do you mean?” And that is when she took me by surprise. “It’s that noise that your stockings make.”
Duh, Duh, Duh!!!
She continued, and dismissively I might add, “you need to turn your panty hose inside out, otherwise I’ll always hear you coming.”
I started seeing those swirls in black, red, and white that old comic book heroes from before my time used to see after a villain had sucker punched them, I kid you not. I really thought that was just an effect for T.V. but it can happen, but I digress. Was it that bad? I had tried to customize my gait to minimize any noise and now to be told that I sounded like a DJ scratching on the turntables–swish swish, swish, swish a swish swish. Whew! You can only imagine the anxiety, creativity, and cramps I had trying to retreat quietly.
I am a firm believer in taking good advice even when it takes me by surprise. So, while in shock, I tucked away this nugget of knowledge, and I must admit it does work!! Silence is not only golden, it’s fabulous. Now in addition to never letting them see me sweat, I don’t let them hear me coming.
And for those of you who are thinking that hosiery is “so played”, it is twenty degrees in the North East, you betta put on some stockings, but turn them inside out!!